And the text message remained unopened..
I was meeting up with a friend recently and although he’d messaged me a few days earlier to firm up plans, the message sat in my phone, unopened and unanswered.
I’ve noticed that some texts will get a speedy response from me whilst others I’ll procrastinate over for days.
So, what’s the difference?
If a message is vague and requires a lot more thought for how to respond (How are you, what have you been up to??) or requires multiple decisions (what time shall we meet, are we having lunch, what kind of food do you fancy?) then it’s really anyone’s guess how long it might take me.
That day, I had been having to make lots of decisions and plans as I continued to move around the West coast of Australia. I replied…
“Sorry, serious decision fatigue, will think about this later unless you have any particular preferences”
And to my absolute relief he replied with,
“Ok, here you go: Let’s meet at the train station, at 11 am and we’ll go for sushi!”
Thank you friend!🎉
What is Procrastination?
Procrastination is often used as a catch-all term for behaviours related to delaying tasks, but it’s important to understand that procrastination is not just one thing; it can stem from a range of different causes.
Imagine saying that you’re ill.
There is no specific cure for ‘ill’, it matters what type of ill you are.
Knowing the difference between a stomach-ache and hay fever means you can choose the right course of action.
Equally, understanding the cause of your procrastination can give you access to the right solution.
How do I identify the cause?
Procrastination- a message to decipher
Whilst some articles make promises “Your one-time guaranteed solution to procrastination!” there is no one solution, because there is no one cause.
I made this diagram to help my clients (and myself!) to begin to identify their reasons for procrastinating. Whilst the list is not exhaustive, it’s a place to start reflecting and shine a light onto what is going on.
Once you can identify your reason, you get the power in your own hands to figure out the best solution for you.
Here are some potential ways to tackle some of them:
Physical/decision fatigue:
I would say this is the first and most important cause to examine.
As ADHD commonly includes challenges around self-regulation, when we are not managing our energy levels, we are far more likely to crash.
And if you’re running on empty, procrastination is likely to be your body’s way of saying so.
Remember, ADHD takes it out of you.
Our attention to everything (attention deficit? Ha!), from noises, smells, visual distractions, the feel of your clothes, ruminating thoughts, and even hormonal changes, all deplete our precious energy reserves.
And making lots of decisions can put additional stress on your executive functioning system, which may already be experiencing strain.
What could you try?
· Are you taking care of your basic needs? Are you eating well, getting enough sleep, getting regular exercise?
· Are you taking breaks at work? Is it REALLY a break? Is your idea of a break answering a couple of emails, or scrolling social media?
Instead think about what makes you feel RECHARGED and truly relaxed.
Going for a walk, going out to get a coffee, sitting in nature, playing with pets or chatting with friends are all great ways to get a recharge boost and prevent burnout.
And for that decision fatigue, be aware of how many decisions and how much planning you are doing on a given day.
And of course, your allies: enlist friends and family to help!
Doesn’t feel urgent yet:
ADHDers experience of time can be referred to as, ‘now, or not now.’ For example, when a deadline is far in the future, it can feel like someone else’s problem, “that’s an issue for future me!”
Having an interest-based nervous systems means activating your motivation at times can be tricky and so you may come to rely on anxiety as a kick-starter e.g. leaving that project until the last minute before the deadline.
We then develop the belief that we work better under pressure but it’s really the ADHD challenge of activation.
Additionally, this high stress approach cannot be maintained over long periods of time. The frequent surge in stress hormones can contribute to burnout and you may have more difficulty activating on similar tasks in the future as you dread the inevitable panic.
What could you try?
Converse with future you
Visualise future you stressing their way through this task. Whilst you may not be ready to sit down and do the whole thing, what contribution could you make now, that future you will be thanking you for?
And when you get there, don’t forget to thank past you for the effort they have saved you!
*A fun part of this approach is that due to challenges related to executive functioning, you may
even forget your past contribution, so finding it when you’re under pressure can be a boost!
Boring, monotonous, regular:
Regular tasks that are dull and require little thought, like emptying the dishwasher or putting clothes away, can feel like a real chore as they never seem to be over. Finding the motivation to do them, when you know soon enough you’ll have to do them again, can be challenging.
What could you try?
If it’s boring, can you make it fun? Try gamifying these tasks—can you empty the dishwasher faster than the kettle boils? Or put on your favourite playlist to make tidying up more enjoyable? Or how about catching up over the phone with your bestie whilst making dinner?
Too long, too hard, too many steps:
Does this sound familiar? Your home needs cleaning so you think…. “I’m going to clean the kitchen, hoover throughout, clean the windows, file important paperwork, then go through my wardrobe and take things I don’t wear to the charity shop’
And then find you do nothing at all.
When a task feels too big, or too difficult, it’s easy to get overwhelmed and put the brakes on.
In addition to this, ADHDers can have difficulty knowing or remembering how long things take and therefore end up expecting to complete a daily list of jobs that would take most people days to complete.
Hello exhaustion and a sense of failure!
What could you try?
Try starting SUPER small.
What is the one job that would make the most difference to you right now?
What’s the smallest step you could take to have that job feel just 1% better than it does now?
Activating can be the challenge, so make success easy.
This can help you feel like you’re making progress and can kick you into gear to do more than the small step you planned.
Think that document will be done in 30 minutes, think you can clean the whole house in a couple of hours, think you can pack for your holiday an hour before you leave?
Try using a visual timer to ensure you have a realistic idea of how long things take so next time you’ll feel better able to plan what you can achieve in your available time (and chuck in some extra time for wiggle room!)
Strategies for procrastination that work…
A word of warning for those strategies that work amazingly well….
🎉Hooray, you tried a new strategy and its brilliant! You have the solution! Goodbye procrastination forever! Or so you thought…..
Any new strategy has a high chance of stopping working at some point. But when it does, no need for self-criticism or disappointment.
Don’t forget that your busy ADHD brain needs novelty and interest, so that awesome new strategy will one day become that boring old strategy.
Prepare to pivot, try something new and focus on what works for you, not what you’re told should work…
Moving Beyond Short-Term Solutions: Tapping into Intrinsic Motivation
Whilst these strategies can help you get moving in the short term, creating lasting change also requires tapping into your intrinsic motivation.
This is where having a clear “why” becomes crucial.
ADHDers may struggle with low dopamine levels and an interest-based nervous system, which make motivation harder.
But they are often super activated by things that they find interesting, meaningful and enjoyable making it essential to find a strong personal reason to take action.
Coaching can be a valuable tool here.
A coach can help you build a vision, see what’s possible beyond what you imagine and create an aim that feels truly exciting, engaging and reflective of your values, talents and skills.
A coach can help you plan, set actions in manageable steps, create clarity around blindspots, get you unstuck and help you manage your wellbeing.
When you can see your vision and the positive outcomes clearly, taking action becomes much easier.
And don’t forget to enlist other allies- friends and family can provide great support from helping with decision fatigue, being a buddy to keep you company through those boring tasks to being someone to share your dreams and successes with.
Conclusion: Taking Control of Procrastination
Whether it’s tackling a monotonous task with a bit of creativity, breaking down overwhelming projects into manageable steps, or improving your self-care, each small change you make, can help you manage procrastination.
And remember, long-term success lies in tapping into your intrinsic motivation.
By understanding your deeper “why” and using it as a driving force, you can reduce the time spent in procrastination and the frequency of it occurring.
With the right mindset and tools, you can turn procrastination from a roadblock into a stepping stone.
So, what’s the first small step you can take today?
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